Saturday, September 10, 2016

Where's the "er"?


Given my family history, and my requirements for Boy Scouts, I keep up with my health checkups.  So I recently went to see my doctor for my annual physical.  We went through the results of my blood tests, and she asked me how I was doing.  No major complaints, I said, but I’ve been feeling a little less energetic, and seemed to be more subject to minor irritations like soreness, discomfort, or poor sleeping.  That’s not too surprising, she said, because you’re starting to get old.

I waited for the ‘er’. 

As in, “You’re starting to get old-er”.  It didn’t come.     Why didn’t it come?, I thought  Did she really mean what she said?  Did she realize the implications of that missing syllable?  Was it just a slip, or was she trying to tell me something?

After all, we’re all getting older – that’s just a fact of life and numbers.  But I’m not ready to think of myself as old.  Sure, I’m in my mid-forties, but in my eye, I’m still in my late 20’s / early 30’s  - still learning new things, having new experiences, trying to figure out my real place in the world.  How could I be thought of as old? Maybe in the 1700’s I would qualify, but this is the 21st century, and my life expectancy is 93.  I’m not halfway done on this planet yet.

Besides that, we had just finished discussing that I was in great health.  I’m an active person, even to the point of running marathons and triathlons.  I’m all there mentally (ok, mostly) and while I could lose a few pounds, all I have is a minor issue here or there.  They’re nothing debilitating, and more just things that ‘we should watch’, given my history and my family history.  My doc actually downplayed all of the things that I was worried would take me down – she said none of those seemed to be real issues for me.

So why the “old” reference?  I’ve mostly convinced myself that she really didn’t mean it, that it was a throwaway comment to dismiss my concerns as “no big deal” (and they aren’t a big deal).  I did hesitate telling my wife this story, on the off chance that she would agree with my doctor, though.

But it has gotten me thinking about what ‘old’ really means to me, and I’m just not there, and can’t even see there from here.  To me, old implies inactive, passive, disengaged and weak, while old-er simply means that things change.  Fortunately, I have role models in my mother and in-laws of what older can be without being old – they’re all in their 70s, and are physically and mentally active, and engaged in their communities. 

That’s encouraging to say the least, and provide a blueprint for me to follow as I celebrate the many birthdays yet to come.  And with health issues headed for the bottom of my worry list, I can focus a little bit on being happy.

Or should I say, happy-er?

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