Given my family history, and my requirements for Boy Scouts,
I keep up with my health checkups. So I
recently went to see my doctor for my annual physical. We went through the results of my blood
tests, and she asked me how I was doing.
No major complaints, I said, but I’ve been feeling a little less
energetic, and seemed to be more subject to minor irritations like soreness,
discomfort, or poor sleeping. That’s not
too surprising, she said, because you’re starting to get old.
I waited for the ‘er’.
As in, “You’re starting to get old-er”. It didn’t come. Why
didn’t it come?, I thought Did she really mean what
she said? Did she realize the implications
of that missing syllable? Was it just a
slip, or was she trying to tell me something?
After all, we’re all getting older – that’s just a fact of
life and numbers. But I’m not ready to
think of myself as old. Sure, I’m in my
mid-forties, but in my eye, I’m still in my late 20’s / early 30’s - still learning new things, having new
experiences, trying to figure out my real place in the world. How could I be thought of as old? Maybe in
the 1700’s I would qualify, but this is the 21st century, and my
life expectancy is 93. I’m not halfway
done on this planet yet.
Besides that, we had just finished discussing that I was in
great health. I’m an active person, even
to the point of running marathons and triathlons. I’m all there mentally (ok, mostly) and while
I could lose a few pounds, all I have is a minor issue here or there. They’re nothing debilitating, and more just
things that ‘we should watch’, given my history and my family history. My doc actually downplayed all of the things
that I was worried would take me down – she said none of those seemed to be real
issues for me.
So why the “old” reference?
I’ve mostly convinced myself that she really didn’t mean it, that it was
a throwaway comment to dismiss my concerns as “no big deal” (and they aren’t a
big deal). I did hesitate telling my
wife this story, on the off chance that she would agree with my doctor, though.
But it has gotten me thinking about what ‘old’ really means
to me, and I’m just not there, and can’t even see there from here. To me, old implies inactive, passive, disengaged
and weak, while old-er simply means that things change. Fortunately, I have role models in my mother
and in-laws of what older can be without being old – they’re all in their 70s,
and are physically and mentally active, and engaged in their communities.
That’s encouraging to say the least, and provide a blueprint
for me to follow as I celebrate the many birthdays yet to come. And with health issues headed for the bottom
of my worry list, I can focus a little bit on being happy.
Or should I say, happy-er?
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